mood swings~

F***! Why did you appear?! Why must the both of you appear right in front of me?! too bad, it's time to face reality, girl. It's time... I shouldn't write more about it :(

Teacher's Day Celebration was a BLAST! Very fun :D felt very happy because everything went well and I planned it :D me and Faith went around to give teachers a card and a stalk of flower (: representing 2J (:

After class party, went out with Pris, Ya and Nad. Went to TM. shop shop lorh (: bought stars paper and went to Open Plaza to fold stars (: Nad left at around 2.30pm. Me, Pris and Ya went to shop for clothes (: Met Pat at Cotton On. went to T1. wanted to get J.CO... but end up we didn't get any :( Saw Gordon, Amos and their primary school friends outside J.CO. Their friends thought I was a Malay -.-

Went shop, shop, shop~~
At around 5.45pm, Pris and Pat went off first... Me and Ya went around walk walk... Saw Gordon and gang again.... Since they said 'Hi' to me, so I waved back at them and of course, HI too :D

went ToyRUs. guess what?? Saw Yong Bin and Jun Wei !! kinda surprised to see them there :P Both of them whacked me with the stick thing :( HAHA! Jun Wei damn cute!! He wanted to hit me on the head de... then Ya standing in between us, so guess who did he whacked?? XI YA :D

called Daddy to pick us up at 7pm...

(:

waka~ Enjoyed yesterday! School are fun! Thanks to my wonderful friends :D
NPCC- It was our last session of self defence course. Before that, kena pumping. Shout too much le, now having sore throat xx was the timer cause Ryan wasn't there. But I really agree with what zane said about our batch, We're really not up to the standard that was expected of us.
After the test, we told zane that we want to clear 20, so that we owe her only 100 more. was the timer again. sore throat :(

After NP, sat down in the canteen, fold stars with Pris and Ya. Stayed till 6.45pm. At 8pm, went to look for Bryan. Had a talk with him till 9.30. before going home. his gf prob again....

my first step.

good Xi Jia. You have moved 1 step today - You saw him and you forced yourself to look away. I'm so proud of you (:

byebye to you...
My first love.

I can't let go.

Is letting go of you so hard?
I don't know what is going in your mind. But it is simply hurting me too much. I can't go on if this continues... Please. Will you let me enjoy the last few months before you graduate??

dumb me.

i ought to forget you now. But why?
I want to move on... But...
You are like the outstanding moon among the dark clouds at night... You always shine brightly in my eyes and I simply love your presence...

WHY?

Argh! Why are you confusing me? What's with that attention you asked for just now? Was it just me or that's what you want? Can you please stop doing this to me? I ... I had ... I had enough. I don't want to get hurt again. I trust you. I trust you that you will solve this soon.
Great, now I'm back to where I was... sigh.

:)

Yay! I feel so proud of myself :) I've finally let go. Even though I'm still slightly afraid, at least I'm halfway out of the darkness. Now, I feel more loved. Loved by surrounding people.... The love that I used to get from him. :) I'm gonna move on. As a cheerful girl.
I believe without him, I can still move on happily. I'm going to forget him. Yes, I will :)

delete button

I'm going to press the delete button now.



From now on, I'm gonna forget that part of sweet yet hurting memories...

Goodbye.

Friday (13 August)

This is a reason why I never share some problems with you. Cause you'll never understand how pain it is, to leave someone you love. I really really hate it.

You really cant sense the difference of the atmosphere after what you have said. Just 6 words, and I'm down. Thanks Siti and Elyana for realising that I was down after what she said. Thanks. At times, it's really hard to understand you. Hard to see what's in your mind, what you want us to do. I really fear for the worst to come... And of course, i do hope that it will never come...

Typical Thursday!

Today was an okay okay day :) AT was fun! hahaha, despite those rumors, Me and Nathan were still close close close friends :) Love it! hahaha~

helped PDS with Secondary 4 Inter-Class Captian Ball Games. was standing under the sun as i had to record down the scores. Freaky hot! hahaha, Yi Jun, John, Wei Yong and Seet Yuen were damn funny! At first I was under them, then they moved me away. Sad-ed. I got an lollipop by helping them to snap a photo :) So easy!

Got another one when I helped them shot a video. Seriously, they are damn jokers!
Tio sunburn le larh :(

Science! and Art! Inception!

Yesterday we had Science practical in Chemistry Lab. It was damn epic! Suddenly Hui Jun called out for teacher and that's when everybody realised that a fire had broke out. Mrs Goh stupid sia, use cloth whack the bunsen burner, make the fire bigger!
Then HJ ran out of class. Thought she scared of fire sia. But she went to get teacher. That teacher used the fire extinguisher and suey for Mrs Goh. kena her shirt. BLACK shirt.
Kenneth was laughing really madly. LOL!

ART! hmm... Lavette and Nathan changed seats and Lavette vandalized Nathan's table with .... i would say, RUMORS. i dont know larh. But now the whole class is spreading this news -.-

After school, went to watch Inception with Pris, Pat and her mum. Damn nice! Got free lunch, free show, free popcorn and drinks :) The show was nice. Quite exciting and touching. Almost cried :P Just realised that I've been crying a lot recently -.-

Ashaley's Birthday & National Day 2010

Saturday -
Went PP with Celine, Grace, Joyce, Pei En and our 2 China buddy - Ting Yang and Xin Yue. Went to had chicken rice! then did some shopping... Saw pris! Was really shocked to see her there but HAPPY too (: yeah, blahblahblah...

was chionging fro the bus. But end up only me, celine and grace went up the bus -.- we had to wait for Pei En, Joyce and our 2 china buddy outside school gate. After saying goodbye, me, celine, Eunice and Joyce went T1. Hang out until 5.30, asked Elyana banana out for dinner (: went shopping and had LJS for dinner :D

Sunday -
Went to Uncle Chin Siong's house to celebrate Ashaley's 3 years old birthday (: went there in the evening to swim! went swimming with Kym, Nat, Ya and Zheng. After sometime, our birthday girl came to join us (: Marcus was having fever, so he didnt join us for swimming. Yeah, the naughty birthday girl sat on my back and i scratched my knee against the floor!! ouch~

went to bathe then BBQ!! ha, the chicken wings were awesome! the fish too! but i ate parts which were raw xO Nat did some magic, which she had yet to master. Late in the night, around 9.30, we cut the cake. hmm, CHEESE cake! After the cake, me, nat, marc, ya, zheng and min did jumpshots! whoots! follow by watershots (:

we started playing some weird game with this boy from level 3. He was 'shooting' us with his laser gun. So we acted (: we pretend to be shot, blocked... It's kinda fun (: Had some photoshots that were damn cool! But not planning to post on FB. sent Uncel Chin Lee and Ah Shuan korkor home. Me, him, Ya and Min were super hyper! We were laughing, joking, singing and saying all kinds of weird stuff we can think of XD, singing Went home around 11. Tired day...

Monday -
woke up at 6.40am and got ready for parade at T1 field. Luckily it was a short one (: After parade, went CS to change! went to Open Plaza for fun and took jumpshots (: After that, me, pris and Elyana went to PP. Met up with Wei Heng there. He brought us to play pool. It was my first time playing that and it was really FUN!

Went ECP after that. Hahaha, we were burying his leg and caused his legs to be numb (: he said he looked kinda playboy XD took cab to Marina Barage. He was telling us about bangalas. When the taxi came, i said, "ehh, bangala." Yet, he asked the uncle, "Uncle, you mei you qu..."
IN CHINESE!! We were laughing like siao! Joke sia! Saw the group of boys that were playing pool next to us before that. Went up and saw jets...
Me: ehh, later we point up and say, "WOW!!" but just for fun de!
Wei Heng: Okay!!

then some people really believe us sia!! saw Nicholas (:

wapiang, we walked really long and gave up cause we didnt know where to go. Wanted to take cab, but there was none that was available. shot them :(
took bus instead. Really walk a lot sia. reached MRT then took MRT back to Tampines (: wanted to eat Pizza Hut. But it was 10+ liao, all close le. So eat MC DONALD lorh. Stupid Wei Heng, keep joking! went home around 11+. Leg damn suan...

My most memorable National Day (:
and the fireworks are AWESOME!!

Just another thinking of mine...

Why is it so hard to forget?? Despite all those negative stuffs that were told to me about you, i chose to follow my heart. But this time, I really dont know what am I thinking. I dreamed to be with you, I want to be with you. But you dont seems to be interested anymore. Should I give up??

missing...

ahaha! Love today :D spent a lot of time with my darlings :D with them, i never failed to laugh XD THANKS DARLINGS!!

missing him :(

bad headache~

argh, this bad headache is making me go crazy! it's really torturous!! pain, more pain, even more pain. feel like fainting any moment -.-
argh gosh! getting sick this few days xx

sigh, missing him badly...

regret.

I gave it up. For you.
Even though i was really looking forward to it, I gave it up.
The joy on your face when i told you that I wont be able to make it...
It's all a lie. I lied about not being able to make it. All for you. I dont know if you knew, but Siti knew. I thought it was a pretty good act. but it doesnt seems so. Maybe its okay to give it up for my Best Best Best Friend :)
But will i be able to give up if we happen to like the same guy? Will I?
I do hope that this wont happen between us :) I want the best for you. I want you to smile. I want you to live happily :)
I LOVE YOU!